Unreal Expectations
When I began planning my wedding, the word quickly spread around the office where my husband works. He’d long been though the ultimate bachelor (or married by some unattached women) and so word of his marriage came as a shock to many. That he was marrying someone much younger than him from the States… Well, it’s not surprising to hear people still talking about our wedding.
A woman who worked for the same company heard that I was planning the wedding on my own without even so much as female friends in the physical vicinity. She decided that was wrong and took it into her hands to help me out with the planning.
She didn’t have a daughter and was very excited to ‘adopt’ me. Having cut most ties to my family, I was feeling a bit lost and welcomed a motherly touch in my life.
Things went a bit astray. What she and I thought we wanted in our lives turned out to be the case. I was a bit mature and the non-shopping type to play true daughter, and I was beginning to realize that if my biological mother wasn’t going to be the mother I needed in my life, I certainly wasn’t interested in bringing in someone new to replace her.
The wedding went well and I appreciate everything she did for me, but even now things are a bit awkward between us because we’re not quite sure how to be around each other. We had expectations for each other that turned out to be not what either of us wanted and that hinders us from becoming close friends now.
With time and effort we can become close friends. However, I have learned to not step into relationships with expectations and that replacements never work…
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