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The Man Behind the Curtain

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‘Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain!’ the voice booms as the great Wizard of Oz is revealed to be no more than an ordinary mortal man when Toto pulls the curtain aside.

As I lay in bed trying to get to sleep last night, I thought about how perfect the scene from The Wizard of Oz reflects how I feel about talking about my marriage to other people. I’m more than happy to share the happy times with anyone who cares to listen, but when it comes to the negative times – the personal times – my lips remain firmly sealed.

I read a lot of personal blogs (I grew up with an absolute passion for reading biographies) and I have noticed that it’s generally clear within a few posts where the blog writer stands on sharing personal things. Some will get right into the nitty gritty about anything and everything while others will happily talk about things without making them overly intimate.

I read one blog in particular that hides nothing. The blogger in question has no qualms about the fights he has with his partner, the reasons he is disappointed in his partner, so on and so forth. He talks about positive things as well, but I’ve noticed the sad trend of more and more posts being about the negative instead of the positive.

When I started working on this post, I thought it was just a matter of ego that kept me from talking about the negative times in any sort of detail here on the blog or in my offline life; I like the image of the ‘shiny, happy couple’ and I’m not keen on giving it up. But as I wrote, it became more apparent that the subject is more complicated than just whether or not you tell people things…


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When you're in it for the long haul, a relationship can be great. What's not to love about having someone with you for fun times and tough times? Even so, commitment has its ups and downs as couples make decisions for the future, get under each other's skin, and grow together. Stay tuned for true stories about dating and marriage, opinions about popular opinions, and thoughts on what it looks like to go the distance.

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