Long Relationships

JG and I hadn’t started dating yet when he first met my parents. It was the first summer that we were working at a summer camp and my mom and dad came for a visit to look around the camp, take me out to dinner, and do general parent-type visit things. Since JG and I had been talking about starting to date, I asked cautiously if I could “bring a friend along,” and I’m thankful that I didn’t see the dubious look that undoubtedly passed between my parents. They assented and the big meeting was on the horizon.

I took it upon myself to brief JG on what to expect from my parents, who are very reserved by nature. I coached him to stay away from sports as a major pastime, inquire after my parents’ recent vacation, and be extremely polite, in general. The plan was a round of miniature golf after lunch, so JG asked if it was okay for him to win. I considered it. My dad isn’t very good at mini golf, but I knew that it would be irritating to him for JG to beat him, so I said, “It would look weird if he won really easily, so just beat him by a little bit.” The plan was set.

The day came and I recall that JG did very well, all things considered. My dad is quiet to the point that it makes people nervous on a regular basis, but JG wasn’t visibly unnerved while we ate lunch. He did well with my mom’s usual line of conversation about how she wishes the kids she taught would read more; at the time, he was considering changing his major to math education, so that was very intriguing for my mom. I was more of an observer, prodding conversation along and leading with graceful lines like, “Mom, why don’t you tell JG about how you and Dad hiked on Mt. Rainier?” All in all, the meal was only slightly uncomfortable, which was much better than I expected.

At the mini golf course, I was terrible as usual, but I’ve accepted the fact that one of my functions on this earth is to make people feel athletic. My dad and JG kept trading the first-place spot; however, at one point, my dad had such a commanding lead that I motioned to JG and whispered, “You don’t have to make it that obvious.” He looked at me with panicked eyes and replied, “I’m not trying to lose! I don’t know why I’m so bad today!”

Incredibly, after we finished the eighteenth hole, the my dad and JG were tied for first place. My dad nudged me and said, “I guess the winner is the one who gets the free game, huh?” Oh, dear. JG smoothly putted the golf ball right into the clown’s mouth and the challenge was laid. I was sure that my dad was going to choke, but he got a free game, too! The round ended in a tie, through and through. I couldn’t have orchestrated that if I had tried.

dating, in-laws, parents, mini golf

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