Long Relationships

Welcome back to Enhancing Sexual Desire week here at Long Relationships.

This week, the lovely ladies who wrote The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Enhancing Sexual Desire, Rachel Greene Baldino and Judy Ford, are answering a question about enhancing sexual desire each day.

This month the ladies are touring with Pump Up Your Book Promotion Virtual Tours to get the word out about their book. (And it’s an excellent book I’m happy to have a copy of! If you would like a free copy, check out this post.) Whether you are new to a relationship or have been in one for twenty years, this book has something for you!

On to today’s question:

“What can we do this Valentine’s Day to create an intimate rendezvous with our lover?”

Judy: An intimate rendezvous is best when you slow down and shift your focus from doing to being. Valentines Day is all about Being in love. What do you love about your partner. Tell him specifically. What turns you on about your partner, whisper the specifics to him. Not with the intention of making something happen, but rather with an attitude of an open and grateful heart.

What is something you might do together that allows each of you to slow down and relax? If you go to dinner, don’t talk about the day. Don’t talk about the past, don’t talk about the future, the baseball scores, your worries or upsets. Simply be together. Hold hands. Be loving. Walk lovingly. Smile. Be of good cheer. Look directly at you sweetheart. Tell them how happy they have made you. Tell them how much you appreciate what they have done for you, how they’ve made your life easier. Ask them if there is anything you can do to make their life easier. and intimate rendezvous begins with intimate heartfelt talk.

Believe it or not, some of the most intimate rendezvous can happen when you skip the expectations that you have and simply lead with your heart that day. Let go of the expectations around this day and simply love yourself and your partner. Do some thing to show that you do.

Rachel: Oh there are so many things you can do. The first is to set aside some time – some REAL time. If that means hiring a babysitter, then so be it! Then, pay attention to what you both like to do best! Going out to dinner can be great, but staying in can be just as fun, and can often give you more freedom to do exactly what you like. When both of you bring a positive attitude to your Valentine’s Day date (or to any of your date nights) you are more than halfway there. Enthusiasm only leads to more enthusiasm (and excitement!), especially in the bedroom.