Partner with Chronic Illness (Cont.)
I’ve already talked about chronic illness and how it affects long term relationships. However, I didn’t get into it very deeply, which I would like to do today.
Being with a partner who has a chronic illness can be stressful on both partners no matter what the illness is. Depending on the severity, it can be an occasional reminder or a daily struggle.
Now comes the statement that might get me in a little trouble with some people, but keep reading:
It’s okay to be mad at your spouse because s/he is ill.
Being mad at someone who gets attention, support, care, love, etc – especially when that all comes from you as well as others – is normal. We all want some love and attention sometimes. Having someone around who requires more than other people can be frustrating.
It doesn’t make your partner any less of a person for needing more and it doesn’t make you any less of a person for feeling frustrated.
Don’t suppress your feelings because they’ll just come out in a rush later exactly when you don’t want them to. Once you start accepting how you feel about things, you can take the steps needed to help you deal with those feelings.
If you are with someone with chronic illness, remember to take some time to yourself. This will help your long relationship continue on even longer. Indulge in your favourite food or activity when you can and appreciate yourself as a human being. Talk to friends about how you are feeling.
I can almost guarantee there is a support group either online or in your community for people who are friends/family/partners of people with chronic illness. Allow yourself to let go and talk about how you are feeling with people who know what you are going through.
Your long relationship will benefit from it.
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