Long Relationships

With most couples, it is fairly easy to be separate in your work lives because you are literally separate – different jobs. However, interesting times do come up when you marry a coworker, your spouse comes to work where you work and/or, like in my case, you volunteer where your spouse works.

My husband works at the head office of a large company. Pretty much everyone at the head office (and quite a few people in the regional locations) know who I am and have met me personally. And have also eaten something I’ve baked. (I love baking cookies.)

I come in every now and then to help various people with tasks that are within their abilities but not within their budgeted time.

At one point, I did apply for a job there, but I didn’t get it.

If there are any rules I have learned about work etiquette, they are:

1. Keep kisses to a minimum. Even a kiss on the cheek around the wrong person can be the beginning of rumors, complaints or worse.

2. Keep pet names to a minimum. The least that will happen (especially if your SO is a guy) is that your love will be made fun of for many weeks to come.

3. Keep your hands to yourself. A shoulder pat is fine, but if that is going to tempt you to do more, just keep your hands to yourself. Even in an easy going work environment, things can always be taken the wrong way.

4. Give each other space. This is an important feature of any relationship, but it is especially important in a work environment. In the end, you’re both there to work.

Are there any more work relationship etiquette rules you’ve learned?

As the time draws nearer for me to find out if I will be working at the same company my husband works for, my mind wanders to the subject of working with your significant other…

Ever since I announced my intention to apply for the job, I have received a lot of support. I volunteer there regularly, so many people know my work style already. However, I have had a few comments come my way about working with my husband.

We wouldn’t be working directly together on a daily basis at all. I would be in reception and he works in the information services and technologies section. (Otherwise known as ‘he works at the help desk’.) I might need to call on him from time to time to help me with something, but that’s about it.

Even so, we still have had comments, laughs, and head shaking at the though of a husband and wife working together – even in different sections on opposite sites of the building.

I personally believe that we would be just fine. We can put aside our personal squabbles to get things done when they need to be done. But maybe I’m wrong? Maybe I can’t really know until it happens?

So I’m wondering:

Could you ever work with your significant other? If only in certain circumstances, what circumstances? Could you put yourself in a professional enough mindset to not let personal disputes effect working together? Do you think you would have an easy time but your partner wouldn’t? Vice versa?

***This post is part of the Long Relationships 100 Comment Contest. Click on the link to find out how you can win.***

Compared to many, I (now) have an excellent life. I’m a freelance writer and professional blogger. That means I spend a lot of time in the comfort of my own home working at an occupation I love. While I don’t make a lot doing it, by any means, I do have enough to pay the bills.

Plus, who can put a price on happiness?

Recently, a job opportunity came up. The wages will be good, it’s a receptionist position (which I have done in nearly all my past jobs), I already know people at the company… Basically, it’s a good opportunity for me if I choose to take it.

However, taking this job would mean taking a bit of a step back from the name and freelancing career I have been building up over the past year and a half. While I wouldn’t be giving up all my work – certainly not! – I still wouldn’t be able to dedicate the time and effort I’m putting in now.

But I have to face facts. The money is good and we could definitely use it. We are trying to save up for a baby and hopefully a new house. That’s not going to happen any time soon if things don’t change.

While I don’t consider my situation a sacrifice, really, seeing as I don’t have to do it whether I want to or not, I can’t help but wonder…

What have you sacrificed for your relationship? Have you done anything you didn’t want to do for the sake of any aspect of your relationship? How did it turn out? Do you regret the decision or are you glad you did it?

***This post is part of the Long Relationships 100 Comment Contest. Click on the link to find out how you can win.***

My husband works as a desktop support engineer at the main office of a company that runs nursing homes and charity shops. The company often likes volunteers to come in and help out.

Of course, as a spouse of an employee, I was asked to volunteer.

I felt a little nervous and awkward because I’d never worked in the same place as the person I was in a relationship with. However, I knew that at home behaviour was probably going to be largely inappropriate

The first few volunteer sessions were still a time of trial and error for me. I caught myself going to slap B’s ass a few times. I had to keep things like kisses both appropriate and to a minimum. I also stayed in my section and we only contacted each other if we needed anything. It was all very professional once we got the hang of it.

I found that, after a few times of being strict with myself, I was enjoying the volunteering experiences more. Not that I don’t love smooching and touching my husband, but treating the atmosphere more professionally made me feel more professional about it.

Just like you play the roles of worker, parent, sibling, friend, etc in your life, you might sometimes have to play the role of coworker with your spouse. It might not seem very fun to be so professional with your spouse or significant other, but it will be a very healthy thing for the relationship if you can do it.

You will show yourself and others that you both can be professional and serious when needed, which could lead to further opportunities for both of you.

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Want to read more about married life? Check out Marital Talk.