Long Relationships

Some days you just have to take a mental health day.

The moment I snapped at one of my reviewers, I knew the day was going a lot more wrong than I cared to admit. Things have to be going pretty badly for me to hand out a verbal lashing via the internet. That was the moment that I knew I had to get off the internet, away from the computer and out of the flat.

I love my job, I truly do, but it will drive you bonkers if you don’t get out and be around nature regularly. I’d forgotten to take that into account and let the days drift by as the working stress mounted.

I went to the shops and wandered around a bit, just calming myself down and looking at ‘the pretty, shiny things’. Not really buying anything, just looking. After a while of that, I picked up lunch and headed down the highway to the local lake/park where Mr. JM and I got married.

Talk about stress relief.

Being in the breeze, among the trees, sitting by the lake… I started feeling better right away. There is nothing like nature to help make you feel rejuvenated.

I called up the husband a few hours later and told him I’d meet him at the pub when he got off work(not too long a walk for me and on his direct route home, whereas the park is a pain in the arse for him to get to). Mr. JM, the darling man that he is, knows when I’m just having a bad day and when I’m having a *bad* day. When he rocked up to the pub to pick me up, he came in with brightly coloured flowers in hand to cheer me up.

I am very thankful I took a mental health day, but I’m even more grateful that I have a wonderful husband who understands that I need to take those days sometimes.

Another gem from Mr. JM

NINE WORDS WOMEN USE:

(1) Fine:
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes:
If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing:
This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

(4) Go Ahead:
This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!

(5) Loud Sigh:
This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about
nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) That’s Ok:
This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks:
A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you’re welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says ‘Thanks a lot’ - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say ‘you’re welcome’ - that will bring on a ‘whatever’).

(8) Whatever:
Is a woman’s way of saying f*** YOU!

(9) Don’t worry about it, I got it:
Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to #3.

*
Send this to the men you know, to warn them about arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology.

*
Send this to all the women you know to give them a good laugh, cause they know it’s true!

Hello everyone!

I’ve decided to hold a contest that will be a good thing for everyone. I don’t feel right just asking for help without offering something in return, so I figured a contest would be the perfect way to do things.

I write for a site called The Bloggers Guide, writing articles all about my beloved Melbourne and surrounds. Currently, they have a contest running for the six regional winners from around the world. (I’m standing for Australasia.)

I’m hoping to not only win the grand prize but to also have at least some of my entries become popular enough to be published in The Bloggers Guide to Melbourne book. I very much need your help.

What You Can Win

Like I said, I don’t feel quite right asking for your help and giving nothing in return. What I’m offering you is… drumroll… a copy of Chicken Soup for the Soul: Campus Chronicles. (The one in the picture.)

Why this book? This recently published book just so happens to have a nonfiction story about a horror roommate of mine tucked in its pages.

I’m giving away three copies. If more than ten people enter, I will increase the number of copies to give away to five.

If you’re not keen on this book, just let me know and we’ll work something else out.

Winners of this (my) contest will be announced May 3rd.

How to Win

I very much hope you’ll go in and vote to help me, as it doesn’t take a lot of time and you don’t have to sign up to do so. However, there is no way to keep track of who voted. Because of that…

All you have to do is put up one post. Easy peasy. Just let your readers know what’s going on and that I’m looking for a little help from my friends (I’m going to get that song stuck in my head now). Put up a post with a little blurb, the links to where they can vote, and how they can also go in for a chance to win. (They must come back here to leave a link to their post to be entered.)

Where to Vote:

Go here: http://www.thebloggersguide.com/wbc and give five stars to The New Australian.

Go here: http://www.thebloggersguide.com/melbourne/the-new-australian and rate me at five stars again.

Lastly, go here: http://www.thebloggersguide.com/blogs/jmsilver That’s a list of all my blog entries. You can click on the “+” signs next to each entry.

Voting goes until May 1st, so be sure to check in often and cheer on The New Australian.

As always, thank you for your kindness and support.

Hello and welcome to the Friday Free-for-All!

Inspired by the Weekend Soiree over at Wifely Steps (and pretty much using her idea, to be honest, but you can go over there and play on her site as well!), we’re going to have a bit of conversation here on site. I’ll be responding when and where I can, but it would be great for the readers to respond to each other as well.

If you make a comment and it doesn’t show up, let me know using the ‘contact me’ button under the site description on the right. That way, as soon as I see the email I can rescue it from the depths of the spam filter. But, seeing as the spam filter is no longer regarding me as spam, I’m hoping none of you will have any problem.

The way the game works is this:

I pick a theme that we’ll be talking about and will start off things with a question. The first person to come along will then answer that question and ask another question still relating to the theme.

(Remember to ask another question! It makes the game harder if people only answer them.)

Eg. The theme is peanut butter. I ask, “Do you like peanut butter?” Someone answers and at the end of the comment asks, “When was the first time you tried peanut butter?” So on and so forth.

Easy? Yes, I thought so. Which brings me to the theme and the question for this week:

Theme: Computers

Question: How have computers changed your life?

***IMPORTANT NOTE: To celebrate the upcoming 50th Love Question, I will be giving away a print from Jenera Healy Photography. Keep checking in to find out how you can win.***

It’s still over a month away, but I figure it’s a good thing to let you know early that there will be a contest happening….

Thank you to Elisa of Watching Doctor Who for this week’s question.

I’m sure many of us sleep next to our significant others at night (or did with past SOs) and don’t think much of it. Even if things aren’t getting hot and heavy at night, you sleep next to each other.

Sometimes SOs have to hit the road and couples don’t get as much time to sleep next to each other as other couples do. However, besides being grateful for the time the SO spends at home and being able to cuddle at night, do you really think beyond sleeping in the same bed?

I never thought much about it. Until recently…

Make sure you leave a link to your answer in the comments section and link to the sites featured with the questions.

If you do answer on your blog, please spread the link love and link to:

Aud from Mom.Dad.Chat
Abbey at Random Thoughts
Jenera at Just Me

And, of course, I always appreciate your links to me.

Don’t forget to leave me a link in the comments to your response.

Have fun!

As much as I’d like to dive straight into the family drama on here, I’m not going to. You never know who is lurking around your web spaces. I’m not going to be too specific, but there is something I’d like to talk about. Just to get the stone out of my gut if nothing else.

In your life, you get to know people. Some people you don’t want to know, some you have to know and some you seem to make a connection with that is stronger than obligation.

When I came to Australia, there are many, many people I thought I was close to who didn’t attempt to contact me. Not a peep. Not a whisper.

Some were mad at me. I understand that. People don’t like when other people leave, don’t like change, even when the leaving is to the benefit of the person who has gone.

But there are others who, unless I’m terribly mistaken, weren’t mad at me at all. A few even said they expected me to pick up and leave sometime.

But there is one person in particular who I was close to, one person who wasn’t mad at me for leaving, one person who said s/he expected me to leave… There is one person who, as far as I knew, was there for me. We weren’t so close at first, but we learned to understand each other and became closer for it.

But, now, what hurts the most is I’m severing ties to that person.

Since I left, I have been trying to establish and maintain contact with the person I’m speaking about. No luck. No go. S/he has my email address, has access to free internet, even has my mailing address… This person knows I would send money if s/he needed it to pay for stamps. I’d do it, just to stay in contact.

Not anymore.

I’m tired of making all the effort, trying to get in contact, trying, trying, trying. I thought we were close, but I guess I was wrong because I haven’t heard anything.

I thought I knew the person, but I guess I was wrong. But I’m not going to let it upset me anymore. I’m done.

I’ve always been one to stand up and remind women that men show their love in different ways to women. For a lot of guys, providing for the family is the biggest show of love they can make. Men, in general, are usually better with actions than words.

But, given I’m still young enough to be quite silly, I forgot to apply this ‘sage’ advice to my own life…

The other night, my husband presented me with a movie I had eagerly been waiting to see.

As I smiled and did my little happy dance, I turned to him and said, “You see, it’s when you do stuff like this that I know you love me!”

I don’t doubt that my husband loves me, but it is always nice to have reminders of that love.

Last night, we got to talking about our past and the subject of actions versus words came up. I was under the impression that there was something I did a long time ago that he hadn’t fully forgiven me for yet.

“But we got married,” he said, looking confused when I mentioned it.

I said, “Yes, but you can love someone and yet not trust them completely.”

He looked at me as if I had marbles coming out of my ears. “Yes, that’s true, but we got married. If I was still hung up over that, I wouldn’t have married you. It would have been like…” In a very rare occurrence, words failed him so he mimed a gun to his head and pulling the ‘trigger’.

I must have looked embarrassed at that point because he smiled sympathetically and said, “It’s like you said when I got you the movie – you know I love you when I do things that make you happy. You’ve been waiting for the words [of forgiveness] all this time, but I’ve been showing you.”

Duh. Silly me.

I am probably opening a can of worms that I really shouldn’t be opening with this one, but I found this video and I think it’s quite fascinating.

This show is in India and features talk of proposed amendments to laws in India. However, it is no secret that societies not only in today’s world but also previous times have often struggled with what should be done with the sex industry.

The sex industry includes everything from sex toys to videos to actual prostitution, so for clarification sake, I’m talking only about the prostitution side of things. Also for clarification, I don’t want to get into a religious debate or anything. I’m not here to get into the religious aspects.

Should prostitution be legalized? Well… Maybe it should.

While I was listening to this video, I couldn’t help but agree with the first speaker – the teacher. We ‘sell’ our minds, our time, even our body parts (organ donation) and our blood. Sex is pretty much the only thing left for people to turn up their nose about selling.

Imagine if there could be a system to it all that wouldn’t trap women forever in a cycle of abuse. Imagine if it was legalized and health standards imposed on each and every brothel – and all the women (and men) within. It could make things a lot different for a lot of people.

Honestly, I think criminalizing the sex industry is just another way for humanity to try to control humanity. Take away religious and politically correct aspects and what you have left is a matter of who can tell you what to do with your body. If you think your body is a temple, then you don’t have to become a prostitute. If you think of sex as a fun way to pay the electricity bill, then you can have a casual or get full-time employment.

I don’t want this post to be seen as me being gung ho for legal prostitution. I haven’t dedicated the time or the research on all the involved issues to put my final opinion out there. These are just my initial impressions.

It is an interesting subject, though, and one that has come up even more recently for the United States as a proposed help for the national deficit. (Imagine legalizing but also taxing such things. That’s certainly one way to get out of debt…)

What do you think?

Hello and welcome to the Friday Free-for-All!

Inspired by the Weekend Soiree over at Wifely Steps (and pretty much using her idea, to be honest, but you can go over there and play on her site as well!), we’re going to have a bit of conversation here on site. I’ll be responding when and where I can, but it would be great for the readers to respond to each other as well.

If you make a comment and it doesn’t show up, let me know using the ‘contact me’ button under the site description on the right. That way, as soon as I see the email I can rescue it from the depths of the spam filter. But, seeing as the spam filter is no longer regarding me as spam, I’m hoping none of you will have any problem.

The way the game works is this:

I pick a theme that we’ll be talking about and will start off things with a question. The first person to come along will then answer that question and ask another question still relating to the theme.

(Remember to ask another question! It makes the game harder if people only answer them.)

Eg. The theme is peanut butter. I ask, “Do you like peanut butter?” Someone answers and at the end of the comment asks, “When was the first time you tried peanut butter?” So on and so forth.

Easy? Yes, I thought so. Which brings me to the theme and the question for this week:

Theme: Television

Question: How much television do you watch in an average week?

***IMPORTANT NOTE: To celebrate the upcoming 50th Love Question, I will be giving away a print from Jenera Healy Photography. Keep checking in to find out how you can win.***

It’s still over a month away, but I figure it’s a good thing to let you know early that there will be a contest happening….

It’s no secret that my husband and I would be thrilled to get a dog. We want one so bad, but we rent and we don’t have a back yard. Even if we can justify one of those two things, the other always sets us back. And so we wait, feeling rather depressed, for the day we can get a dog.

Mr. JM has had dogs as pets for most of his life, so it would be a bit uncomfortable if I was out-and-out not a dog person whatsoever. Mr. JM isn’t really a cat person, but we can’t get a cat because of my allergies, anyway, so that isn’t a problem.

Either way, I highly doubt we’d break up over it, if either of us had come along pre-packaged with a pet. It would have made things interesting, though.

Make sure you leave a link to your answer in the comments section and link to the sites featured with the questions.

If you do answer on your blog, please spread the link love and link to:

Aud from Mom.Dad.Chat
Abbey at Random Thoughts
Jenera at Just Me

And, of course, I always appreciate your links to me.

Don’t forget to leave me a link in the comments to your response.

Have fun!

To be completely honest, there are a few different things I wanted to post about today, but I just can’t get my mind straight enough to develop any sort of post on any of the subjects. I’m just blathering on today, so feel free to ignore…

I don’t feel overwhelmed with life or anything like that, but there are so many things I want to concentrate on right now and, as per usual JM, I can’t figure out what I should focus on.

At the beginning of this year, I mentioned that I didn’t want another 2008 to happen this year. Meaning, I wanted to work on not getting stressed to the point of illness, focus on things other than work and paying bills, etc. I’m doing a lot better on the stress front, but I’m having a hard time prioritizing and balancing the other important things in my life.

What I’d like to know from you is this: Do you know who you are?

Strange question, maybe, but I’m completely serious. Do you know who you are? Are you happy with who you are? If you had the chance to completely reinvent yourself, who would you be?

These are just a few of the things I’m struggling with. I have the opportunity of a lifetime: I can be whoever I want to be. I’ve started a new life here. The problem is, I don’t even know who I was, not to mention who I want to be.

Your relationship with yourself is the most important relationship you’ll ever have. Period. So it only make sense that I’m a little flustered when I don’t feel a strong direction to take with things. But I can’t help but wonder if many people feel that way. Maybe it’s not even an age thing, just a ‘human condition’ sort of thing…

Aren’t these absolutely gorgeous? It makes me want to learn how to knit.

Remember the Pay It Forward comment contest? Well, a package arrived for me with what I won from Knitting Passion.

Really, this picture does not begin to cover how wonderful and gorgeous these are. Even my husband said, “Those are way too nice to just use as cloths. Maybe we can piece them together for a quilt or something.”

It would be a super small quilt, but you know it’s quality when Mr. JM is impressed.

Now, I haven’t forgotten about my promise. No one commented about any interest for blank embossed cards, but I really don’t know what else I can make that won’t take heaps (and heaps) of time and/or won’t incur massive shipping charges. So I do hope someone out there is interested. I’ll make a couple and put pictures up.

I went shopping yesterday and bought three different types of envelopes (fancy pink, fancy blue, plain blue) to go with the cards. If you win, you’ll have your choice of envelope. I can probably even give you a mix, if you prefer.

Three lots of five is what I’m planning on because that will take me long enough as it is. I don’t have a light table, so that makes the process quite a bit slower. Hm. I could do some stamp/watercolour ones too, as a bonus. Maybe I’ll just have a card-making day and give you your choice of them.

As you can see, I’m still in the planning stages, so if you have any suggestions, please let me know.

MESS TEST
Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Place a fish stick behind the couch and leave it there all summer.

TOY TEST
Obtain a 55-gallon box of LEGOs (or you may substitute roofing tacks). Have a friend spread them all over the house. Put on a blindfold. Try to walk to the bathroom or kitchen. Do not scream because this would wake a child at night.

GROCERY STORE TEST
Borrow one or two small animals (goats are best) and take them with you as you shop. Always keep them in sight and pay for anything they eat or damage.

DRESSING TEST
Obtain one large, unhappy, live octopus. Stuff into a small net bag making sure that all the arms stay inside.

FEEDING TEST
Obtain a large plastic milk jug. Fill halfway with water. Suspend from the ceiling with a cord. Start the jug swinging. Try to insert spoonfuls of soggy cereal into the mouth of the jug, while pretending to be an airplane. Now dump the contents of the jug on the floor.

NIGHT TEST
Prepare by obtaining a small cloth bag and fill it with 8-12 pounds of sand. Soak it thoroughly in water. At 3:00 p.m.. begin to waltz and hum with the bag until 9:00 p.m. Lay down your bag and set your alarm for 10:00 p.m. Get up, pick up your bag, and using every song you have ever heard. Make up about a dozen more and sing these too until 4:00 a. m. Set alarm for 5:00 a.m. Get up and make breakfast.. Keep this up for 5 years. Look cheerful.

INGENUITY TEST
Take an egg carton. Using a pair of scissors and pot of paint, turn it into an alligator. Now take a toilet paper tube and turn it into an attractive Christmas candle. Use only scotch tape and a piece of foil. Last, take a milk carton, a Ping-Pong ball, and an empty box of Cocoa Puffs. Make an exact replica of the Eiffel Tower.

AUTOMOBILE TEST
Forget the BMW and buy a station wagon. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment. Leave it there. Get a dime. Stick it into the cassette player. Take a family size package of chocolate chip cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car. There, perfect.

PHYSICAL TEST (Women)
Obtain a large bean bag chair and attach it to the front of your clothes. Leave it there for 9 months. Now remove 10 of the beans.

PHYSICAL TEST (Men)
Go to the nearest drug store. Set your wallet on the counter. Ask the clerk to help himself. Now proceed to the nearest food store. Go to the head office and arrange for your paycheck to be directly deposited to the store. Purchase a newspaper. Go home and read it quietly for the last time.

FINAL ASSIGNMENT
Find a couple who already have a small child. Lecture them on how they can improve their discipline, patience, tolerance, toilet training and child’s table manners. Suggest many ways they can improve. Emphasize to them that they should never allow their children to run wild. Enjoy this experience. It will be the last time you will have all the answers.

Hello and welcome to the Friday Free-for-All!

Inspired by the Weekend Soiree over at Wifely Steps (and pretty much using her idea, to be honest, but you can go over there and play on her site as well!), we’re going to have a bit of conversation here on site. I’ll be responding when and where I can, but it would be great for the readers to respond to each other as well.

If you make a comment and it doesn’t show up, let me know using the ‘contact me’ button under the site description on the right. That way, as soon as I see the email I can rescue it from the depths of the spam filter. But, seeing as the spam filter is no longer regarding me as spam, I’m hoping none of you will have any problem.

The way the game works is this:

I pick a theme that we’ll be talking about and will start off things with a question. The first person to come along will then answer that question and ask another question still relating to the theme.

(Remember to ask another question! It makes the game harder if people only answer them.)

Eg. The theme is peanut butter. I ask, “Do you like peanut butter?” Someone answers and at the end of the comment asks, “When was the first time you tried peanut butter?” So on and so forth.

Easy? Yes, I thought so. Which brings me to the theme and the question for this week:

Theme: Peace

Question: What helps you feel peaceful?

This is a little late, but the antibiotics seem to be kicking in and I have some energy today. (Woohoo!)

Today I have been thinking about everyone I know who is stressed out because of illness, money issues, just plain tiredness and a million other reasons. Finally feeling human for the first time in a month, I wish I could help out all my friends - and my husband - with relaxation days of pure indulgence.

Part of the problem is vacation. I can’t just pop over to their houses and say, “You go have the day for yourself; I’ll watch the kids.” Another is money. There is a pay issue with one of my jobs, so I don’t currently know if I have the money to pay my bills, much less for indulgences for my friends.

And so I’m left imagining, which isn’t such a bad thing. Imagining leads to dreams which lead to goals which lead to wonderful things.

So let’s start imagining, shall we? Think of something wonderful, relaxing, pleasant and indulgent for the weekend to come. Even if it doesn’t happen *this* weekend, you never know…

Make sure you leave a link to your answer in the comments section and link to the sites featured with the questions.

If you do answer on your blog, please spread the link love and link to:

Aud from Mom.Dad.Chat
Abbey at Random Thoughts
Jenera at Just Me

And, of course, I always appreciate your links to me.

Don’t forget to leave me a link in the comments to your response.

Have fun!